You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
