with your own penis?
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize
