69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
