Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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