How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
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