haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
