so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Come see our sink grown plant.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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