ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
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drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
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Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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