Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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