just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
