i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Randomize
