grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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