I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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