absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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