Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
