you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Randomize
