you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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