If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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