i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize