This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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