How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
