then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
