It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
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