To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
