Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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