he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
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