who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
It was a blind-side dick pic.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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