ADVERTISEMENT

• (419): View more from Ohio

  my computer doesn't work...

  (619): View more from California

  why?

  (419): View more from Ohio

  i puked on it last night

  Fav 4 1142 2710

  share tweet
  

• (607): View more from New York

  I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name

  Fav 13 7107 1435

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...

  Fav 40 3947 1414

  share tweet
  

• (908): View more from New Jersey

  This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me

  Fav 16 4305 852

  share tweet
  
• 

  23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (850): View more from Florida

  I mistook a propane tank for a keg.

  Fav 21 1185 10461

  share tweet
  

• (801): View more from Utah

  i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?

  Fav 22 3482 1722

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (843): View more from South Carolina

  I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself

  Fav 6 2112 1027

  share tweet
  

• (419): View more from Ohio

  I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.

  (1-419): View more from Ohio

  I'm out of town so we should be golden.

  Fav 5 2466 699

  share tweet
  

• (818): View more from California

  All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.

  Fav 7 1231 1324

  share tweet
  
• 

  These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (480): View more from Arizona

  Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.

  Fav 10 1796 695

  share tweet
  

• (509): View more from Washington

  Stalker pic that shit

  (1-509): View more from Washington

  He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'

  Fav 2 659 828

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (203): View more from Connecticut

  I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina

  Fav 6 799 501

  share tweet
  

• (713): View more from Texas

  I had sex in a panda mask the other night.

  Fav 1 527 304

  share tweet
  

• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.

  Fav 3 460 106

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (713): View more from Texas

  MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.

  Fav 5 49 38

  share tweet
  

Randomize