Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
So vagazzling was a success
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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