come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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