quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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