I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Randomize