I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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