therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
i need to put some appletini on your dick
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Randomize
