You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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