first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
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