I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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