Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
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