how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
why do cheetos always look like penises
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
