I forgot how hot balto sounded
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect