Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
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