This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Oh god it's open bar.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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