you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
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