What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Randomize
