I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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