is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
So squirting runs in the family.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize