grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
