I need help removing her.
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
