the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
