In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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