These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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