Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
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I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
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I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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