but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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