in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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